Citroen is on a hiding to nothing with the new C5 X, unless it is satisfying its Chinese masters
Copyright William CROZES @ Continental Productions
Promising car enthusiasts a blend of saloon, estate car and SUV, in what it believes is its most outlandish new Citroen since the original ID19, gives good cause to Iain Robertson to revel in the sad but entirely stupid self-destruction of a once proud brand.
While Citroen believes that its new large car is arriving at precisely the right time, all I can foresee is a wealth of second-hand (because they will have been pre-registered, believe me) examples of the ‘X’-suffixed C5 hitting the bargain basements like another Jordan, or Hamilton autobiography. Face it, despite attracting a phenomenal following, the actual sales of both renegade ID and subsequent DS Citroen models were disastrous enough to force Andre Citroen’s company into liquidation.
Big Cits do not sell. When the luxurious CX25 hit the new car scene, apart from the dealer principal registering one for personal use and countless members of the motoring press cooing and aahing at the unabashed elegance of another big Citroen (in which their personal funds would never be invested), it was a sales disaster. The later XM introduced several innovations and was unerringly upmarket but it failed to generate much more than a few whispers at retail level. Retail customers were terrified by plummeting trade-in valuations but it made a great used acquisition, as long as you could tolerate its unreliability.
Big Cits do NOT sell. The next generation C5 dipped its toes into the fleet sector, with a modicum of success…well, twice as many registrations as the XM, which was not really a success at all. Again, the German-accented C5 made a great second-hand car, at the right price. Then, the Gallic company gave us the C6, an enormous barge of a car that compromised access and egress, despite a promise of acres of cabin space. Citroen dropped it like a hot spud.
Despite its promise, the new C5 X is surprisingly close to the earlier C6 dimensionally. It even manages to share its snout, although the extremities end at the front wing edges in an unfortunate stroke victim rictus. It is worth highlighting that, unlike previous big Cits, oleo- and later hydra-pneumatic ‘magic carpet’ suspension media are no longer a signature feature, which means that even that single and decent reason to contemplate a big Cit has been consigned to the automotive annals. To be fair, it uses metal springs, active dampers and the much-vaunted ‘cushions’, as if they might save the day.
However, the most annoying aspect of the new C5 X lies in its ‘shove-everything-in-a-blender-and-let’s-see-what-emerges’ approach to the new car scene. Perhaps it is about time for the powers that be within PSA Group (or perhaps Stellantis?) paid their design team a small salary and a bigger bonus related to sales performance? It would certainly curtail a steaming pile of unmitigated crap from landing on the new car scene of Western Europe. There is no earthly way for one car to satisfy the needs of families, antiques purveyors and the ‘Let’s Off-Road!’ set, unless its starting base is that of a Land Rover Discovery (a model that, incidentally, I loathe) and the company’s management team has been snorting on an unfeasibly immense sack of cocaine.
Bearing in mind that we have a tad more than eight-and-a-half years until most of Europe goes electric. The best that Citroen can offer is the same package as announced recently for the new DS9, to which model, if for no other reason than reducing unit manufacturing costs, Citroen must owe a debt of something but not necessarily gratitude. Petrol-electric-hybrid is it, with a punchy 222bhp petrol-only alternative, when not opting for the hybrid gear. Needless to say, the plug-in hybrid can provide up to 31mls of EV-only range, although the recharge times, despite having an on-board charger, are sluggish at best. It is an insubstantial and unpromising future wrapped up in one model.
Then, Citroen talks of space, with a 545-litre boot that can open out to 1,640-litres, when the rear seats are folded. If it is space you want, look at what deals you can get from Skoda on its Superb Estate, which is a car designed for purpose, unlike the C5 X which is a clear case of form over function. It is also an arguing point, when boasting of rear seat space, for Citroen to provide a delightful picture of a petite Chinese lady lounging in the nearside rear corner, while tapping on a mobile-phone, when it is abundantly clear that slotting in another pair of young Chinese ladies would fill the rear bench comprehensively. If you are not going to pile on the bull, at least position a couple of burly Welsh rugby players in the back seat and then video their exits.
The dashboard is familiar fayre, if you know what the DS alternative looks like, it is pretty much the same. It is accompanied by one of the largest head-up display units of any in the car industry, in full Technicolor, projected from the upper surface of the digital instrument binnacle. By factoring in another pair of USB slots, Citroen can boast that its C5 X is more advanced than any of its perceived rivals in a field it loves to point out is one of the most connected ever. While the company has worked finally on improving the sensitivity, tactility and efficacity of its touchscreen technology, I can tell you categorically that any of the German brands purporting to be in the same market sector as the C5 X can outgun it in a heartbeat.
Finally, having experienced PSA’s early attempts at semi-autonomy, I would not trust the C5 X’s ADAS packaging as far as I could throw it. The bottom-line for me is that Citroen ought to concentrate on its smaller models, which it manages very well, and leave the Germans to deal with the larger class of car, of which it has a track record of never managing with any competence whatsoever.
It is blatantly clear that this new C5 X is a Chinese ‘invention’ and intended primarily for its domestic market. Looked at positively, were you to travel to China, a C5 X could well be your taxi from the airport…just watch your head as you alight from it.
