Necessary steps to prepare yourself for divorce mediation
A divorce is one of the most challenging experiences of life. Many people going through divorce struggle with the emotional trauma more than the financial or practical issues that come with the process, while others struggle in the opposite direction more. Divorce is usually exhausting for all parties directly involved. It may take people years to emotionally and financially recover from it.
While many marriages often end in contentious divorces, it doesn’t have to be this way. The former couple can make the process a lot easier and amicable with an alternative dispute resolution, like mediation. Paula D Kleinman Divorce Attorney offer divorce mediation services throughout Oceanside, California. Mediation is much faster, more efficient and cordial than the stereotypical, high-stress, screaming-in-the-court divorces.
Mediation is a much easier alternative to divorce, but you should still prepare for it beforehand.
Choose the best mediators
Before the mediation process can begin, the divorcing couple must agree on a mediator. It is vital to choose a mediator with no conflicts of interest. A mediator is a neutral individual that only guides the process. Remember, a mediator does not give a decree or advocate some point. He or she is merely there to show you the door. Both parties must walk through the door on their own accord.
It is preferable if both parties make separate lists of potential mediators and compare them for a matching name. This way, they will start their journey towards divorce on somewhat common ground. This method will prevent any disagreements this early into the journey.
Gather the evidence and necessary documents
When both parties agree on a mediator, their next step should be to highlight what they want out of the divorce. Mediation offers them an opportunity to sit down and discuss the divorce terms in a private and comfortable setting. Mediation is far more laid back than courtrooms. Either party can closely work with an attorney to make a list of ideal divorce terms along with any evidence or documents that substantiate their claims.
The couple can privately discuss alimony, debts, division of assets, etc. While they can also draft a rough parenting plan in mediation, it would need approval from a family court judge. It is a judge’s duty to ensure what is best for the children. As long as it is a reasonable and well-thought-out plan, the judge will approve it with minimal revisions.
Consult an attorney about your issues
A mediator does not eliminate the need for an attorney. Since the mediator is neutral, he or she won’t feel obligated to advise you or your adversary through the negotiations favorably. An experienced divorce attorney can assess your situation and devise the best method for mediation. Both parties may invite their attorneys to attend mediation for some or all the sessions.
An attorney may also be the best to give you professional advice when unforeseen issues arise during mediation. With their guidance, you can strengthen your case and make a more substantial impact in the negotiations.
What if mediation doesn’t work?
Many couples have bitter endings to their marriage. They are too angry at each other to sit down in peace and discuss the future. Either one or both are too unreasonable to reach common ground in complicated issues, like property division, pre-nup contracts, and alimony.
Such issues may not necessarily remove mediation as an option. If you encounter such a contentious issue, you can leave it for court and focus on solving what you can through mediation alone. Some problems are just too complex for mediation, but certainly not all of them.
Mediation gives rise to a hope that you may yet part on good terms and maintain tranquil relations with each other in the future.